It can be difficult to capture our thoughts, when we are younger there is not a lesson on how we should think. As we grow we learn to interpret different situations. It is these situations that happen that can cause a cycle of negative events.
Often, we are unaware of our thoughts in specific situations, causing us to say things such as
I don't know what I was thinking
I just did not think
We are constantly thinking, often without realising it. Sometimes, we drown out our thoughts with background noise such as music or TV. We might chat on the phone to family or friends, or spend countless hours watching videos and reels, endlessly scrolling.
The main factor when looking at our thoughts is, the situation does not change. but the way we think about it can.
We cannot change what has happened, we cannot control what has happened but we often become preoccupied with the situation instead of focusing on our thoughts.
Our thoughts about a situation influence our emotions which then impacts how we behave.
We can start looking at situations and logging our thoughts and seeing how these have impacted us, in terms of our feelings and reactions.
So how do we start to recognise our thoughts?
We can begin to focus on our thoughts by keeping a record, we can do this by using a
Diary
Journal
Thought log
Notes on our phones
How do we do this?
We can start by saying what has happened
The situation
Then you could add what you thought about it
My thought
Then you could write what you felt about it
My emotion
Then you could log how you reacted
My behaviour
You can also note what was happening within your body
My physical symptoms
Let's go through an example
The situation
I messaged my friend, I could see the message was read but they did not respond.
My thought
I must have done something wrong.
My emotion
Anxious.
My behaviour
Avoid/Archive message.
My physical symptoms
Restless and fidgety.
Learning to record our thoughts and look at the entire situation, along with how our thoughts affect our emotions and subsequently our behaviours, is the first step in learning how to challenge them.
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